my revelation.
"alam ko kasalanan ko, sorry."
he broke up with me. at last, nakapag decide na rin siya ng tama. =) i didn't text him for a while, at napagod na siya. haay, i feel so bad not because wala na siya sakin. i feel bad because i've hurt him so much. i know, i'm a mean girl. and i broke his heart. but those times na hindi ko siya katext, i was weighing my feelings. is it enough to carry on. or is it too low to let go? i admit. unti unti na ko nagffall sa ibang tao na wala namang pake sakin. but still, pinagpatuloy ko pa relasyon namin. kasi naman, it was hard for me to let go kasi i know his feeling. dati, ako naman yung nasa position niya when i was with *blastoise*. it hurt me like crazy! but i had my time to move on. kaya i had to convince myself to fall in love with him again. pero wala na talaga yung spark. sabi nga ni mariz, "you love him, but you're not in love with him." haay, alam ko na galit na galit siya sakin ngayon if ever man mabasa niya to. he told me he still loves me. at gabi gabi siyang umiiyak because of me. mean me! i hate this, kasi this time ako talaga ang mali. he's not the one to blame. for my friends who trusted me this time, i'm sorry. lalo na sa mga ka-y.e. ko. it's a shame, sila pa nagbabanta kay *him* if he broke my heart. pero ako papala mananakit sa kanya. i hope he'll be able to move on soon. as for me, alam ko naghihintay yung karma. nako, lagot ako. :(( siguro pause muna ako. ayoko na muna mainlove. ayoko na munang makasakit. since the sy started, ang dami ko na nasasaktan. like my friends. my bestfriend. if only you know, pati mga magulang ko nasaktan ko na din. but oh well, i know that someday i'll meet the right man for me. ang nakakainis pa dun, si *him*, mas lalo pang nasaktan dahil kay mf. mas binibigyan ko daw ng time si mf. nagselos siya kasi si mf binibigyan ko ng comment at gusto ko pa daw kachat. i can't blame him, kasi totoo namang binibigyan ko ng comment si mf at gusto ko siyang kachat. but that's because he's a close friend of mine. chaka takot akong bigyan ng comment si *him* kasi baka mabasa ng tita ko. i just didn't tell him kasi baka sabihin niya i'm too weak to protect our relationship. well i am, kasi it's so important to me. and gusto kong kachat si mf kasi napapatawa niya ako. =)) pero yun lang talaga yun, it ends there. i'm over the kilig kilig moments with him. hahaha. oh well, i guess tama na tong post na to. i'll post again soon. lavya guys!
one look, and i'm mesmerized by your eyes.